Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Married life Tips

Tips to Save a Marriage from Divorce

Communicate – Talk and Listen:Proper communication is one of the
most important tips to save a marriage from divorce. Most of the problems
in marriage arise because a spouse doesn’t understand what the other
wants. There are things that you might expect your spouse to understand
without your mentioning it. At other times he might not have heard what
you said. Tell him what you want. He loves you. However, at the same time,
he might act stubborn. Reason out with him. One stands a better chance
talking it out with his partner rather than sulking in silence.
Deal with Problems Pro-actively: Some problems can be as small as
picking up the child from school, or more serious issues related to
managing finances of the family. Sit down and analyze the problem.
Discuss how much time and energy each can invest in shouldering
responsibilities of the family, and draw out a plan how to meet these
needs.
Spend Time with Each Other: The pressure of meeting career demands
and ensuring financial security for the family leaves one with very
little time for his/her spouse. Lack of time is one of the most common
causes and reasons for divorce. One has to make a conscious effort to
spend time with his/her partner. Even when you want to relax, sit or lie
down beside him or ask him to sit with you. Talk with him during this
time. Ask him simple questions like what happened in the office that
day. He might be reluctant and aloof. However, if you persist, he is
sure to come around.
Pep up Your Married Life: Most couples do not realize it, but lack
of excitement is one of the major issues as to why marriages fail.
Think of the things that you did together in the initial years of
marriage or while you dated. Recall each others interests. Go out
for a short vacation together. What about going out on a date together?
Get tickets to the season’s baseball match or go shopping or to the
opera depending on your spouse’s likes. Add that excitement to
your married life. Many couples have realized how bringing
excitement into their lives have helped them to see each other
with renewed interest.
Seek Help: When one’s marriage is going through a rough patch,
there would be a lot people with all sorts of relationship advice.
While many of them would be useful, it is for one to decide which
one stands in the best interest of his marriage. Don’t be swayed
by what family and friends have to say. There might be some,
who due to personal interest, may give wrong advice on purpose.
Learn to identify well wishers. A better option than to seek advice
from family and friends is to go for marriage counseling. These are
trained professionals who are capable of viewing the problems in
an objective way and provide valuable suggestions. For self-help,
refer to books on marriage and divorce. The Internet is also a full
of information that can save your marriage.
Be Patient: It is important to realize that problems in marriage
were not caused overnight. Hence, expecting them to go away
quickly is a mistake. Patience is one of the very important tips
to save a marriage from divorce. When a couple considers divorce,
it indicates that considerable damage has been done to their
relationship. One might not be ready to cooperate in efforts that
might save the marriage. In such a scenario, it is important to give
one’s partner some time. Showing frustration or dissatisfaction
towards one’s partner may make matters worse

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